39 Supportive Things to Say to a Male Survivor of Sexual Assault

Its a common idea that its impossible for a male to be raped. Male survivors who speak out are typically consulted with the reaction, “How can a kid get raped?” The answer is, if he does not provide his authorization, its rape.

Here are thirty-nine uplifting messages for male rape survivors.

Shaming men and boys out of crying is psychological torture for those who truly wish to reveal themselves. Men who have actually been raped ought to be uplifted in their healing, nevertheless they please. If their recovery consists of shedding a tear for all the pain they endured, it is their right to do so.

When a man is seen sobbing, he is typically informed to “man up.” Due to fear of being called weak, males keep in all their tears instead of releasing them.

In 2013, I ended up being an activist for survivors of sexual assault. I was living in New York City, and my method for getting the message out was through chalk art. To recover my voice after the NYPD tossed out my sexual assault case, I went all over Brooklyn and Manhattan scribbling chalk art messages about authorization.

Picture how hard it is for a woman to speak out and report a rape. That trouble is doubled for males since the patriarchal principle that “guys can not be raped” ruins any expect male survivors to get the support they should have. This concept completely dismisses the real-life experiences of millions of men who in fact have actually been sexually assaulted.

“One in 6 males will be sexually assaulted at some point in their life. It does not make us weak or less manly– nor must it. Rather, we, as males, must motivate other guys to speak up, to be bold, share this problem with others, and to attend therapy and take medication. There is such a thing as healthy masculinity, and we can discover that in our fellow males, in comforting those who are having a rough time. Looking for aid in a healthy method, wishing to be much better, practicing empathy and compassion and caring for each other are ways of practicing healthy masculinity.” ~ Anonymous.

For worry of not being believed, its reasonable to assume that millions of guys conceal in silence. Really few heal or recover due to the preconception of male rape.

It does not matter if the rapist was male, female, or any other gender identity. Its rape if he rejects approval. Anyone of any gender can be raped.

Ever since, I have done countless chalk art drawings all over the world, from Europe to South Africa. Utilizing art as a tool of advocacy has been an extremely effective method of reaching millions with an important message: Its time to replace the present rape culture that we live in with a culture of approval.

Suicide rates are typically greater in males due to the fact that a lot of them stop working to express their emotions due to the patriarchal principle that crying suggests weak point, particularly in guys.

Guys stories matter. Males healing is just as essential as recovery for others. When males heal, the whole world heals, due to the fact that the world is still run by males.

Why is it that men are less most likely to be supported than female survivors of sexual attack? No matter an individuals gender or sexual preference, all survivors are worthy of love and assistance.

1. Your pain is legitimate.

2. The individual who did this to you is the only person to blame, not yourself.

3. You are not less of a man for being sexually assaulted.

4. Being a survivor does not define who you are as a guy.

5. A survivor is anything but weak.

6. Dont be scared to speak about it.

7. Never ever blame yourself.

8. Things will get better.

9. You are so exceptionally strong.

10. Im happy of you!

11. You are not alone.

12. What you are going through is temporary.

13. You are liked.

14. Youll see the light one day and more than happy again, I promise!

15. You have many individuals who believe and support you.

16. You deserve love and regard.

17. You do not need to feel embarrassed.

18. Talking about it to somebody you trust will help.

19. You are heard.

20. You stand.

21. You dont need to be strong all the time.

22. Its fine to cry.

23. Youre safe to reveal your feelings.

24. Some days may be much better than others, but you will get there.

25. You will grow and survive this present pain.

26. We support you.

27. Even if you had an erection, you still werent “asking for it.”.

28. Even if you had an orgasm, if you didnt want it, it was rape.

29. We applaud you and your nerve.

30. Feel the discomfort instead of numbing it.

31. You got ta feel it to heal it.

32. Youre still manly and I love you.

33. Tears signify strength.

34. The illness of another is not your problem to bear.

35. Being a victim is tough, however in time you will recover.

36. There are people out there that love you and want to listen to you (including me).

37. Keep surviving. There is a lot to live for.

38. You are brave for admitting what occurred.

39. We are in this together.

Prior to I understood this, in my younger years, I recall pressuring myself to be readily offered for sex with people. I would even reach to catch them, thinking that thats what they wanted. I had seen it a million times in motion pictures as a way of women starting sex: no concerns asked, simply attack.

To produce a much safer, more loving world for everybody, let us regard and assistance male survivors of sexual attack instead of projecting toxic masculinity rooted in rape culture.

The girl looked puzzled and asked me what it suggested. I informed her that it suggests anybody can get raped, whether they are a male or a woman.

One of my pals that I utilized to hook up with informed me when that he was tired of my sexual advances. Because I was caught up in stereotypes about male sexuality that I offered myself to someone that didnt have interest in me, I felt so ashamed and disgusted with myself.

I offered her the straight-face-emoji-look and stated, “Actually, thats not real. Guy who get raped are shocked simply as much as female victims. Ive met lots of people who have been raped. Its a major problem.” She tidied rapidly.

The reality is, men and boys are not sex makers. Nobody is. Its always okay to state no to sex, and its never acceptable to assume that somebody wants to do it.

Rather, we, as men, must encourage other guys to speak up, to be brave, share this burden with others, and to attend treatment and take medication. That trouble is doubled for guys due to the fact that the patriarchal idea that “males can not be raped” ruins any hope for male survivors to get the assistance they deserve. When males recover, the entire world heals, because the world is still run by males.

This is why sexual education is so important. Its inappropriate for us to discover sex from movies, tv, and pornography.

Male who have been raped should be uplifted in their recovery, nevertheless they see fit. Male who get raped are distressed just as much as female victims.

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She break into laughter and stated, “A person … hahaha … get raped ?! Ha! How is that even possible? Shit, Im sure they would enjoy that. Thats every persons dream.”.

Men have freewill to choose if they wish to have sex or not. If you are somebody who dates males, its important to accept that the males in your life may not constantly be in the mood to do it, and thats alright.

The concept that guys can not get raped is perpetuated by the false belief that all guys desire is sex, every hour of the day. While I was doing #StopRapeEducate chalk art in New York City in Union Square one day, a young, Afro-Latino couple stopped to read the message I was writing: “Rape understands no gender.”.